Jennifer's Testimony

My name is Jennifer, and I was born into the Mormon church to my parents who were both striving to live according to its teachings. They were sealed in the temple, and taught me from a young age the importance of Temple marriage. This is something that I looked forward to in my own life.

     I was baptized on my eighth birthday, I received my "Gospel in Action" award when I was twelve (An achievement in the Primary age group). I continued on into the Young Women's program where I served as the President of the Beehives, President of the Mia Maides, and the Secretary for the Laurels. I received my patriarchal blessing when I was sixteen. I recieved my "Young Womenhood in Recognition" award shortly before I turned eighteen. I enjoyed going on "splits" with the sister missionaries, and after doing a "Mini Mission" with them I started to consider going on a mission myself one day. When I was eighteen, I was called to a position of assistant nursery leader. I graduated a few months later with my 4 year graduation certificate from the seminary program.

     If you know anything about the programs in the Mormon church you are probably quite aware of the dedication that is required to achieve some of these goals. Even though I wanted nothing less than to be married in the temple, nothing less than to achieve my position in the celestial kingdom and to be with God there, I still wanted to know for sure if the church was true, I needed my own testimony. I had been taught that everybody needs to find out for themselves if the church was true, and according to Moroni's promise all you have to do is have faith and to pray, and then the answer will come.

     When I was sixteen I started to want to know for myself. And it made sense to me that if I wanted to pray to find out if something was true that I should be just as prepared for the "no" answer, as the "yes" answer. I knew very well that it is easy to make yourself feel and think things while praying and that it is hard to discern what God was saying and what I was saying. So, I emptied myself of all thoughts and feeling and prayed to God... Well, I didn't get a yes or a no, I just felt empty. I wasn't too terribly concerned, first of all, millions of people before me couldn't be wrong, right? And second of all I figured God would tell me in his own good time. Periodically over the next few years I would pray that same prayer, trying harder, seeking more, and I fasted often...all the while wanting that Yes or No.

     When I was 21 years old, I was still wanting to know the truth, I hadn't gotten the "Big" answer yet. However, I was still certain that the Mormon church was true, It just seemed to make sense after hearing the testimonies of my friends and family.

     One day I was at work and I had lunch with a co-worker that said that he was a Christian. I told him that I was as well, and I was also Mormon. He gave me the "your not Christian" look that I was quite familiar with. Which opened up a discussion of Mormonism vs. Christianity. Then he challenged me to read the Bible and let the Bible speak for itself and not to read into it what is not there. Upon further discussions I came to realize that what the Mormons teach about Jesus Christ, and what faith and grace are, is completely different to what the bible says. It became so clear that I had to make a decision, do I want to believe what the bible is saying to me, or do I want to believe in something that contradicts the Bible? Well, the decision was not a difficult one. I decided to renounce my beliefs and become a true Christian, one that believes in the true Jesus not the one that was manufactured by the Mormon church.