Jessica's Testimony

Jim and the rest of Concerned Christians,

I just wanted to thank you for your site. I've been having some trouble ever since I looked into Mormonism. Let me start at the beginning.

I began dating my boyfriend my senior year in high school. I knew he was Mormon, but was brought up to not judge and not disrespect other's religions and beliefs and just left it at that. When I went off to college this past fall, I found that something wasn't right. I couldn't put my finger on it, and it drove me mad inside. So I prayed and asked for direction. Over my Christmas break I was searching the web for nothing in particular when I stumbled over the LDS website. I don't know why, but at that moment I started crying. It was then that I knew that I wanted to be able to share my beliefs with my boyfriend and wanted to know exactly what he believed and why people were so against his church. The LDS website was set in such a way that it looked a lot like what I believed and knew to be true. I saw that they read and believed in the Bible, along with some other works that I just figured to be works, not "additional scriptures" which is what they truly are. (Kind of like how Catholics have the Catechism; standards to help live by I guess.) So I decided to look into his beliefs without telling anyone because I felt that I couldn't have any ones help. That I had to do this on my own and I was sure that my parents would freak out and yank me out of school. So I set out to find what was so "special" about this church.

So I told my boyfriend what I had been doing he was very supportive (of course) and told me that I could really get something out of talking to some missionaries. That they would be able to give a first hand account of what the beliefs really were. So I looked and found a church on campus. Everyone was really nice and friendly. I found it kind of strange though that most people that went were those that were single or just joined recently (like less than 6 years ago). The missionaries were really sweet and nice and talked a lot about the Bible and brought in all the beliefs that I have had since I was a kid. So I thought that there was no harm being done. They told me that God has a plan for me and that he wants me to go live with him someday. And then they asked me if I wanted to be baptized. I WAS SHOCKED! It was too soon. I had only met with them twice! And I hadn't even told my parents and I was trying to find the right way and time to tell them. So of course they said that they would pray for me. But also warned me something that disturbed me. The said that once people realize the goodness that their church has to own, the devil tries to pull you away from it. That really puzzled me because in a sense they are afraid of the devil. That gives him more power than God!! All my life I have been aware that he exists, but I have never feared him before. I haven't even thought of him that much. To me thinking about him and fearing him gives him the satisfaction that he needs, wants, desires. He wants us to fear him. To question God's power. That means that God isn't all-powerful! My boyfriend's mom had even told me this that when she had joined the church when she was 17, there were physical reasons that she couldn't go Sunday mornings...she was sick, her mom got sick and she had to take care of her siblings, the car didn't work, the weather was bad etc. She said it was a good 9 months that it seemed the devil was after her. And she said that my parents m y threaten to take everything away from me in order to keep me from joining...(the devil was working through my parents?!?!)

So anyways... I went home one weekend and found that I couldn't keep this anymore form my parents. I broke down and told them. I didn't care anymore what happened. I felt terrible about not being able to share this with my parents. I have been very close to them throughout all these years and it made me physically ill keeping this from them. So may times I wished I could tell my mom over the phone what was happening. So I did. And everything fell apart, My parents freaked out and threatened to kick me out of school, that they were going to stop supporting me, that I was not to associate with my boyfriend anymore. Every trick in the book. Exactly what they said would happen happened. But then my parents calmed down and realized that I was their daughter and they said they would help me through this just as they had every other problem that had come in my life. So mom drove down to college and we spent weeks researching. We went to websites the "source" as they call their church sometimes, our church...even members that left. (Which apparently is a big no, no in the Mormon church because the don't carry the spirit with them and are bitter towards the church)

So to make an already really long story short, I found what I was looking for. I want to be able to share my beliefs with my husband and bring up our children (of course once I'm married and once I actually want to have kids) in the church of the Lord. I am not going to have my children fearing the devil. As of now I made such a hard decision in that I broke up with my boyfriend... it just stinks because I was brought up not to judge others on their beliefs. Because, in the end it isn't me judging. It is our God. And through Jesus we are saved. It just hurts now because I see something that he may never see and know what he may never know. So I want to thank you for your sight because if religion ever comes up again, which I am sure that it will, I feel I now have different ways of approaching him so that he will realize that I am not trying to belittle, disrespect or even convert him, just bring Christ to his life. Keep up the good work and God Bless.

Sincerely Thankful, Jessica